Confused
by A Feather of Pepa
Summary: Sometimes, I think people are confused because they are angry. Or afraid. Or maybe uncertain at the future ahead. Or they are grieving over a lost son, shot down at the brink of light. Because of our fighting, we have caused a father pain. We have caused a child to lose his life when at the edge of appeasing his father. I think that's what drove Mandrake to be insane- and confused.


Sometimes, I think some people are confused.

I think they are confused as to where their hearts lie. Where they belong—what they are doing. Whether they are doing what they think—_believe_—is the right thing, or whether they are doing it for their own greed. Sometimes I think they believe both are right. Doing it for the motive of their own desire applies to how people react to it too. Maybe it is for the better for some people—and maybe it's for the worse.

Leafmen fought for what they believed in. Bogans fought for what _they_ believed in. Both people were both right and both wrong. But they are the ones who are confused.

See, like my role model—former Queen Tara—once told me in a dream, people are confused all the time. People don't know who they are, or some don't even know what they believe in at all! It boggles my mind—though to an extent. I have to remind myself that I'm a mere kid—what would I know about all this hocus-pocus? I had a forest to run! As a new queen, I'm destined to run this place as greatly as my mother queen once did. Even if she wasn't biological—she cared for me, and loved me like her own, just like my real mom. They were close friends, too. And Tara promised to always look out for me.

But confusion? Tara was not confused. Tara was _never_ confused. She knew what she was doing—she was the servant of the blood of the forest. And now, I am too. So I _had_ to be confident. Confidence was vital.

But how to I assure my subjects to feel the same way—when they are fighting an enemy? Constantly? Leafmen were always noble… but all they do is fight. Bogans were not the only ones at a fault. Fighting is not essential. Mother Nature taught us to live in harmony at one point in our eons of living… but we have lost that touch, like a child stomper I saw lose a shoe in our blissful forest. And then another. And then she would walk, barefoot, home.

_Confused_.

It's in our nature now. It's our duty to be confused. There's nothing to be done. Dismissed.

Always fighting.

I hate it.

Change is essential. Change is vital. Change is the blood of our forest.

Sometimes, I think people are confused because they are angry. Or afraid. Or maybe uncertain at the future ahead. Or they are grieving over a lost son, shot down at the brink of light.

Because of our fighting, we have caused a father pain. We have caused a child to lose his life when at the edge of appeasing his father. And once, we have shot down the very same man's soul mate.

And that's what drove him insane.

And confused.

But knowing that we are the very same monsters, just as morbid as they are, makes it so much worse.

Sometimes, I think people are confused. They stagger around blindly in a crazy rage that if they can accomplish bringing down their wives' murderers, they will somehow bring her back.

But she is gone.

Sometimes, I think people are confused because inside, they are crying. They are trapped in a sea of grief, gurgling on the darkness as they thrashed for a way out. Seeing the light makes them shrink, makes them scared. They do not want the light to grow bigger. But it does, and it's the very same light that destroyed his former life, prime, love.

Once, they were part of us.

Sometimes, I _know_ people are confused because, they don't see anything but hate and the urge to serve their kingdom the best they could. They are driven by the way they were taught—never to think about what they are doing, just to do and look away if they are uncomfortable. They are loyal, but they are _blind_. They just do not understand the opposing man's grief, persistence, or equivalent hate.

Sometimes, I think people are confused.

But at what cost?


End file.
